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Cut song
The Girl Who Came to Supper the Musical - Long Live the King (If He Can) Lyrics
Music and lyrics by Noël Coward.
PRINCE:
As regent of a Balkan state
I have to be realistic,
My loving people cultivate
An impulse to assassinate
That is positively sadistic.
POLICE:
But nevertheless artistic.
PRINCE:
My uncle, the Grand Duke Stanislas,
Slept tight-in a bullet-proof nightshirt
Until one fatal Michaelmas
His valet, like a stupid ass,
Forgot to lay out the right shirt.
POLICE:
Believe it or not,
The naive little clot
Forgot-to lay out the right shirt!
PRINCE:
Everything went according to plan
And that, my friend,
Was the end
Of Uncle Stan.
(REFRAIN 1:)
Long live the King - if he can,
And if he can, it takes a most remarkable man
To remain undismayed
When a hand-made grenade
Makes a loud explosion every time
the national anthem's played.
When launching a ship
With a stiff upper lip
Or opening a Church bazaar
He longs for the calm
And the gracious charm
Of a heavily armoured car.
Every procession of state
May, or may not,
Be lightly shot at as it leaves the palace gate,
If the Monarch's bodyguard is twenty seconds late,
He'll be as dead as Queen Anne,
Long live the King - if he can.
PRINCE:
The ruler of a Balkan state
Must always be closely guarded,
No oil magnate, or potentate,
No nun, or undergraduate
Though he's mentally retarded
POLICE:
Must ever be disregarded.
PRINCE:
My uncle, the Grand Duke Vladimir,
Was brave, but they never forgave him
For every morning of the year
Throughout his brief, but gay career
No one but his wife could shave him.
POLICE:
Believe it or nay,
It grieves us to say
That even this didn't save him!
PRINCE:
They finally mined his hot-water pad
And that, my friend,
Was the end
Of Uncle Vlad.
(REFRAIN 2:)
Long live the King - if he can,
And if he can he'll be a very fortunate man.
From the womb to the tomb
He must always assume
That he might be strangled every time
he enters the drawing-room,
He's wise, on the whole,
To refrain from a stroll
Down any little country lane,
It's a hundred to five
That he'll never arrive
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Review: The Girl Who Came to Supper the Musical Lyrics
The Girl Who Came to Supper the Musical Lyrics
SYNOPSIS
Long Live the King (If He Can)
I've Been Invited to a Party
I've Been Invited to a Party (Reprise)
When Foreign Princes Come to Visit Us
Sir or Ma'am
Soliloquies
London is a Little Bit of All Right
What Ho, Mrs. Brisket
Don't Take Our Charlie for the Army
Saturday Night at the Rose and Crown
Here and Now
Coronation Chorale
Curt, Clear and Concise
Welcome to Pootzie Van Doyle
The Coconut Girl
Paddy MacNeill and His Automobile
Six Lillies of the Valley
The Walla Walla Boola
This Time It's True Love
I'll Remember Her
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