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2022 Broadway
Some Like It Hot the Musical - You Can't Have Me (If You Don't Have Him) Lyrics
The song is written by Marc Shaiman and Scott Wittman.
JOE:
My folks were small-time grifters
Yeah, And counterfeiters, too
They never did the kind of things
That most kids’ parents do
Most fathers make a living
Keepin' books or pushing broom
But mom and dad made homemade dough
Right in our living room!
But when the heat got too intense
They took it on the lam
My father left a note that said
“Be better than I am!”
Then Jerry’s clan across the hall
Stepped in to save the day
They took me in and raised me right
And that is why I say
That he’s the needle, I’m the thread
He’s the butter, I’m the bread
He’s the fruit and I’m the peel
He’s Achilles, I’m the heel
Yeah, he’s my brother through and through
Like the Marx, the Wrights, the Grimm!
Yeah, you can’t have "tea" without the "two"
And you can’t have me if you don’t have him!
MACK: (spoken)
Alright, back to work!
JOE: (spoken)
But don’t you wanna hear Jerry’s half of the story?
JERRY: (spoken)
Gotta give the people what they want!
(sung)
My folks were in a business, too
The business we call show
The house was full of hoofers
We were strictly S.R.O
They taught me every time step
Then I shuffled off to school
But on the south side of Chicago
No one loved this dancin' fool!
The gangster kids all knocked me down
And made off with my lunch
‘Cause I was taught to buck and wing
But not to land a punch!
But then Joe here had a brainstorm
When he saw I couldn’t fight
JOE:
I played the odds against him
JOE & JERRY:
And we ate ice cream every night!
JERRY:
Yeah, he’s the bait and I’m the hook
JOE:
I’m the goose and he’s the cook
JERRY:
He’s the beans
JOE:
And he’s the gas
I’m the balls
JERRY:
And I’m the brass
You can’t break up a winning team
JOE:
Like that crutch and Tiny Tim!
[JERRY:
And so you can’t have "ah" without the
JOE:
"Choo!"
JOE & JERRY:
And you can’t have me if you don’t have him!
JOE:
Oh, when we play, it’s just a fact
Our music fills the air
JERRY:
It’s true that opposites attract
And so we make a perfect pair!
JOE:
‘Cause I’m the third, and he’s the root
JOE & JERRY:
That’s the place all chords begin
JOE:
We’re two of a kind
MACK:
If you’re colorblind!
JOE & JERRY:
Sep'rate mothers but we’re brothers under the skin!
So what more can we tell ya’, folks?
We’re partners ‘til the end
It’s nice to know my brother here is
Also my best friend!
JERRY:
And when this duet’s over
JOE & JERRY:
And the music’s growin’ dim
JOE:
As the undertaker starts his spiel
JERRY:
Please remind him, we’re a package deal
JOE:
‘Cause you can’t have verve
JERRY:
Without the vim
JOE & JERRY:
And you can’t have me
If you don’t have him!
Yeah, you can’t have me if you don’t have him!
Read more: Some Like It Hot the Musical Lyrics
You Can't Have Me Lyrics Some Like It Hot
Some Like It Hot the Musical Lyrics
SYNOPSIS
What Are You Thirsty For?
You Can't Have Me (If You Don't Have Him)
Vamp!
I'm California Bound
A Darker Shade of Blue
Take It Up A Step
Zee Bap
At the Old Majestic Nickel Matinee
Poor Little Millionaire
Some Like It Hot
Let's Be Bad
Let's Dance the World Away
Fly, Mariposa, Fly
You Could've Knocked Me Over With a Feather
He Lied When He Said Hello
Ride Out the Storm
Baby, Let's Get Good
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