Caitlyn and Haley
Edges: A Song Cycle Musical
Caitlyn and Haley Song


HALEY
Caitlyn is growing
She grew two inches just last year
Mom says Caitlyn’s becoming a woman
Caitlyn got louder
She’s always talking on the phone
Caitlyn wears earrings and lipstick
Caitlyn got a cell phone
Caitlyn got a license
Caitlyn got a boyfriend
Caitlyn gets everything

Caitlyn won’t play with me anymore
Like she used to
Won’t help me with my homework
Like she did before she grew
Caitlyn tells stories that aren’t true

She told mom she was sleeping over at Julie’s
But I saw her go out with that slimy guy
With hair allover his face
Caitlyn’s now friends with the bullies
Who in middle school she swore forever to hate
Caitlyn is bad now

Caitlyn is stealing mom’s money
Caitlyn won’t laugh at my jokes anymore
Caitlyn says I am not funny
And Caitlyn is dressing like a whore

Caitlyn is growing
I saw her smoke a cigarette
Mom says, “Caitlyn’s becoming a woman”
But if Caitlyn is a woman
I don’t wanna be a woman quite yet

CAITLYN
Haley’s a baby
She hasn’t started puberty
Haley is stealing my sport’s bras
Haley’s flat-cheasted
She’s always looking through my drawers
Haley is still wearing scrunchis
Haley got annoying
Haley’s gotten younger
Haley’s gotten needy
Haley wants everything

Haley is mad I moved out of room
I put my stuff in the attic
Haley just cries when she can’t get her way
She’s way too dramatic
Haley says I act erratic
She probably got that from mom

She’s always acting mean to my boyfriend
She locks herself up in her room
Whenever he comes by
Haley won’t ride in my car now
She says it smells way too smokey inside

Haley is acting like a baby
She has no friends but mom and dad
Haley loves sharing my secrets
And telling on me when I do something bad

Haley’s a baby
Was I that young at her age?
I tell all my friends
She’s just going through a stage

BOTH
I wish Caitlyn(Haley) would stop(start) growing

HALEY
I wish Caitlyn still played foursquare

CAITLYN
I wish Haley did

BOTH
I wish

HALEY
Caitlyn didn’t date those guys

CAITLYN
I wish Haley didn’t cry so much

HALEY
I wished Caitlyn move back in

CAITLYN
I wish Haley had tough skin

BOTH
I wish I had my sister back
My stupid, ugly sister back
We stop ourselves then get real fat
Sneak down the stairs for a midnight snack
I hope we’re on an upward track
I’ll sign a form
I’ll make a pact
She’ll make up all the parts I lack
If I can have my sister back



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